Training Thoughts: Week 5 (Feb 5-Feb 11) — Low mileage

This past week was a bit rough. I had a lack of motivation, not just in running, but in keeping a positive, optimistic outlook. There were also nice moments to the week so all in all, I’ve successfully reset and realigned my thinking, giving myself time to process this past week’s mixed bag of emotions and events. This week’s training thoughts definitely reflect how all over the place (yet still physically in the same place) I am in playing life’s mental game.

Running on the Treadmill is a Metaphor for my life right now

The treadmill is a necessary evil. I ran my long run this week on a treadmill, all 10 miles of it, because of a constant onslaught of rain in the DC area on Sunday and my lack of motivation to not get it done outdoors before it started. Equipped with a 2 hour podcast and setting the treadmill monitor to scenic views of national parks in New Zealand and Utah, I embarked on m longest treadmill run to date. I was extremely surprised to experience such a meditative state and runner’s high on the treadmill. After mile 3, I was in the ZONE. This workout felt like a metaphor for my life. I have been putting so much effort and action into my future plans, yet I am still physically in the same place. Much like a treadmill, putting in effort in the workout yet literally remaining in the same place. Treadmill workouts are not very popular for this reason among many, but that doesn’t make the effort any less of a workout or the miles any less legitimate. It’s all about the mental game. Sure, I was not physically running anywhere on the treadmill, but I was still getting in my miles, I was still acting towards my goals even if big change has not yet happened. I know that as long as I put the work in, take action, and do so consistently, the big changes and opportunities will come.

When to Take time to think it through or just do it

If you know me, or have been following my posts, you know that I am an over-thinker. This tendency of mine defines how I make big decisions in my life. In Training Thoughts: Week 3, I talked about how I keep a healthy balance of reflection without allowing myself to ruminate, which is a lot alike finding balance between taking time to think things through or just doing it. For instance, sometimes I justify delaying my morning workout (or not doing it all or delaying it to the afternoon) as me “thinking it through.” But I know that this “justification” is just an excuse, to lay in bed a little bit longer, to procrastinate. I know that I always feel better after a workout and getting it done in the morning significantly improves the quality of my day. So at that point, I actively make a hard mental turn in my self-talk and say, just do it, Franny. Get up and go. This is how my thought process is with SO many things. This past week, I also announced my website on my personal Facebook. Something that I had been thinking of doing since September of last year. September?! Yes, I literally had been sitting on my website for 5 months because of “thinking it through” (Don’t even get me started on how long it took me until I decided to buy my domain name). But I told myself, just do it, Franny. Your voice will be out in the world and making your site public will keep you accountable in writing posts and maintaining it. For me, it’s really a cause of just doing it, and I always have felt positively after doing so.

Loving From Afar 

Ever since I was a teenager, I have viewed Valentine’s Day as just another day and once I had the vocabulary to call it out as a capitalist, commodified holiday that only celebrates one type of love (often romantic, heteronormative relationships), I started doing that, too. I have felt this way when I have been in a romantic relationship on Valentine’s Day and when I have not. To me, the principal of Valentine’s Day is really quite wonderful, to celebrate and honor the love in our lives. The problem is that Valentine’s Day as a holiday is marketed towards a lot of flawed societal norms of love, that there should be a special day dedicated to celebrating love (it should be everyday!), that the best way to show our love is through material goods (this is one way to show it, but it should not be the only or most important way!), that only romantic love should be celebrated, among many other things I could go into.

In going off of last week’s thought (briefly) on love, I’ve been thinking loving from a far. Doing this applies to many people in my life right now and it looks differently depending on who those people are. For instance, since moving away from California, staying connected and loving my parents has looked very differently. I’m no longer a phone call away from weekend brunches or dinners or having my parents come to my performances. I talk to them everyday, either via text or phone, because that is how I can love from afar until I make them more immediately in my life by moving. Even if people are not physically in your life anymore, there’s always a choice and a way to keep them a part of it. Loving from afar can be letting go of people you once shared a romantic relationship with, accepting that the time you had together is over but you grew and learned a lot from it. Loving from afar can also be calling an old friend for the first time in neither of you can remember and being able to catch up like not a day has passed. It can be sending texts because you remember they started a new job, heard they moved cities, or recently had a big news, happy or sad.

This Valentine’s Day, I encourage everyone to celebrate and honor all love in their lives, romantic, familial, friendships, and self-love. Because it really all truly is wonderful!

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